HomeNewsThe Untold Struggles of Being the Firstborn in a Nigerian Family

The Untold Struggles of Being the Firstborn in a Nigerian Family

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KEY POINTS


  • Firstborns feel substantial pressure to fulfill their parents’ expectations.
  • Balancing personal identity with sibling responsibilities is a common struggle.
  • Societal norms in Nigeria amplify the challenges faced by firstborns.

The position of being the first child in a Nigerian family requires handling challenges and unspoken expectations which are distinct to this role.

From bearing the weight of parental aspirations to navigating sibling dynamics, firstborns find themselves in roles that profoundly shape their identities and life choices.

The weight of parental expectations

Parents tend to push their unresolved dreams about life success onto their eldest child.

By feeling pressured to succeed, one may decide to follow professional choices that differ from the genuine interests, to fulfill parents’ want for validation.

The Nigerian cultural values prioritize both family obligations and individual achievement in a way that creates strong pressure on the first-born children to achieve success.

Additionally, firstborns face high expectations to be perfect because society expects them to establish good examples for their younger siblings.

Navigating sibling responsibilities

The tradition in Nigerian families expects firstborn children to become role models who also monitor their posterior siblings.

Firstborns take on duties to look after their siblings; manage conflicts which arise; and may additionally support the family financially.

The responsibility to take care of siblings while growing personally creates both a sense of leadership and excessive strain, since parents expect firstborns to meet expectations in their education.

A discussion on Nairaland Forum sheds light on the pressures firstborns face, including being the family’s representative and the need to succeed for the sake of their siblings.

The challenge of personal identity

Parental expectations and sibling obligations create barriers for firstborns to discover their individual identities.

Maintaining good examples and fulfilling parental expectations might force them to hide their wants and passions, thus creating a conflict to establish your own individuality.

Firstborn daughters inherit parental roles by becoming secondary parents before their siblings show any maturity.

Societal and cultural pressures

Traditional social conventions across Nigeria add to the weight that firstborns endure.

Social norms require people to succeed in life yet simultaneously boost their family’s reputation.

Social scrutiny adds extra pressure since family reputation depends on the perceived achievements of firstborn children.

Coping mechanisms and seeking balance

Firstborns successfully become resilient and learn leadership abilities that help them excel throughout different aspects of their life.

To address these responsibilities firstborns require defined limits alongside external support systems and continuous communication with their relatives.

However, it’s essential to prioritize well-being, personal aspirations, and familial duties to lead a balanced and fulfilling life.

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